Hard ‘n Phirm Video: TRACE ELEMENTS

14 09 2009

This is the second video in our Country Public Broadcasting System series. A few years ago, Brian Posehn called me and challenged HnP to make fun
of a Country singer named Trace Adkins. “It’s not possible, because
he’s such a redneck,” he said. Our solution was to make Adkins’
style of music about science, a topic rarely covered in the Country

Special thanks to Neil Mahoney, who directed the live action part of
the video, Josh Fadem who was kind enough to appear in it, and our old friends Stonehoney for spending the day recording  with us.
If you like it, by all means pass it along—be warned though, there is foul language afoot so keep it out of reach of the little ones.

Science, Y’all!!!

Join Us… Over Here.

9 02 2009

Hello!  Ready for a link to our Facebook band page?  Too bad:


(I hope you said “no”, otherwise what I wrote up there—that “Too bad”—doesn’t really make sense.  Hopefully you were distracted by all the pictures and such at the new Facebook band page, and didn’t notice the fallacy.

Of course, if you did say “no”… why?  I mean, I know the joke’s based on it, but, really, what’s up?  Do you just not like Facebook?  I get that, I suppose, especially if you’re a hardcore MySpace fan and have been fighting the migration to Facebook.  Which brings up something I hadn’t thought about:  what if you don’t have a Facebook account?  God, I hadn’t considered that.  Well, if that’s the case, well… of course you don’t feel ready—you’ve got a whole bunch of stuff to do.  We’ve just given you a chore.  You have to sign up for Facebook—pick out a name, upload a picture, decide what you want people to think your favorite films are, &c.  That’s a lot to throw at someone who just wanted to see what “Hard ‘n Phirm” was.  You didn’t know you’d have to sign up for anything.  You were definitely NOT ready for a link to our Facebook band page.

But you know what?  Knowing you, person reading the Internet, even though you don’t think you’re ready… you are.  You are ready.  I really believe that.  So go ahead… click it.)


3 07 2008

Nerdist.comGood evening. It’s me, Mike. I’m taking a quick break from showering so that I can tell you about a website that you are going to enjoy, then bookmark, and then enjoy regularly. Note: I am not being paid to promote this. (However, if anyone has anything they want me to promote, just make the check out to “cash” and tell me which camera to urge into.)

For the past few weeks, my friend Chris Hardwick (member of television’s Hard ‘N Phirm (feat. television’s Chris Hardwick)) has been producing a site devoted to exploring and bringing to your world the weirdest and funniest elements that make up the Techosphere. It’s called, very simply: NERDIST.COM.

My two cents* — it’s very funny and it deserves your turning your life over to it. It’s taught me that underneath all our slick, hip, incredibly sexy surfaces… we’re all wearing dork birthday suits. (If I were a real writer, this is where I’d add, “So, leave that cool exterior at the door and get ready to join the Nerdist Colony.”)

Be sure to read July 1’s “Awkward Hands Calhoun…”. It’s great.

Nice work, Hardwick!

* which I received for promoting danzanravjaa.org (thanks Mongolian exchange rate!)

Buy Flight of the Conchords Right Now!

22 04 2008

Our pals Bret and Jemaine have finally released their full length album and we here at HnP Industries are thrilled. Buy it on iTunes or Amazon, we don’t give a care…just buy it. Not only are they the nicest guys you could hope to meet, but they are incredibly talented and funny and continue to raise the bar for musical comedy. Their immense success and legions of fans only support what Mike and I have known for years…Well done, Chaps!

HnP on “Attack of the Show” Wednesday!

1 04 2008

Weeeeell, I’ve been co-hosting Attack all week while Kevin and Olivia are basking in the warm Jamaican sun, but well protected from high SPF sun-block and a thick cloud of pot smoke. The producers were kind enough to ask us to perform (I swear I didn’t ask) live on the show and so it shall be. On Wednesday at 4pm West Coast, 7pm East Coast we will be smearing your analog airwaves with “Trace Elements,” our first country/science song. Please like it. That is all.

HnP Comedy Central Special Now on iTunes!

21 02 2008

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight here.

El Superbeasto

15 02 2008

About two years ago, Rob Zombie asked us to write a theme song based on his luchador comic book hero “El Superbeasto.” We didn’t hear anything about it for a while so we just assumed that he wasn’t that crazy about the song but was too nice to say, “Hey, that really sucked it.” It turns out this was not the case at all…having just returned from touring with Ozzy a few weeks ago, Rob called me and said, “Hey, do you have that Superbeasto theme song lying around?” Of course I did…in my hope chest…under a wish for an iPhone copy-and-paste function and a U.S. Alan Partridge series. The next day he called back and said, “Your theme song fits really well. Would you like to write pretty much all the songs?” FUCK YES WE WOULD. And so it is. Phirm and I are in the process of writing the songs for Rob Zombie presents: The Haunted World of El Superbeasto (now fortified with Hard ‘n Phirm). We’ve seen a bunch of footage and it is FANTASTIC. Flop on over to the official site or join the MySpace page.

¡Viva Rob Zombie!

Email List ERROR and New Album Info

25 01 2008

We’re jerks! We just realized that our email list sign-up form was connected to an old service, so if you signed up for HnP email alerts prior to 10:31pm PST, your email was tossed into a lifeless void that will provide nothing but loneliness. Please sign up again (we know, it’s sucky) to make sure that you can be included on low-impact series of electronic notifications re: live shows, TV appearances, new releases and whatnot.

Say, Last Paragraph, you bring up an interesting point: New Releases…

We’ve already received some emails asking about songs that were on the Comedy Central special that are not on the album or iTunes. We plan to “drop” those and a handful of others very, very soon, so we’ll let you know as soon as that happens (if you signed up for the email list (if you signed up after 10:31PST)).

Thanks so much to everyone who watched the show and has sent us nice words!


25 01 2008

We wanted to embed stuff from Comedy Central’s website from our special but WordPress doesn’t allow that sort of code all up in its business…I shall therefore direct you to my blog

I’d like to thank Typepad for being a much sluttier “anything goes” blogging platform.


“Comedy Central Presents: Hard ‘n Phirm” Tomorrow Night!!!!

24 01 2008

It seems like only five months ago that we went to New York to shoot our very own half-hour comedy special and now good ‘ol episode 1214 is finally airing. Will it be good? What songs will they cut? WE DON’T KNOW! The important thing is that you watch to find out and re-evaluate our place in your heart:

Friday, 1/25
CCP: Hard ‘n Phirm
(though our West Coast DirecTV airs the NY feed at 7)
Comedy Central

Tell others. Pass on the geek of HnP.