This was, by far, the strangest, most opposite of fun video game concept I’ve ever seen, because who enjoys needless simplicity, anyway? I stumbled upon this box of boredom at an arcade in Japantown in downtown Los Angeles. It’s essentially “House of the Dead,” but instead of shooting the zombies with fun guns, you attack them by typing letters that pop up on the screen. This is deadly to zombies because they are, of course, notoriously logical creatures and are unable to process random character strings. I was surprised that the arcade did not contain the other two popular Asian gaming hits “Paperwork Graveyard” and “Flow Chart Wolf Hunt.”
Is this stealthily training people for clerical work to then be absorbed into the hyper-productive fold of Japan’s Borg Collective? Scare-igatou! Then again, I’m told that violent crime is significantly lower over there because Japanese policemen carry keyboards instead of guns. Also they eat fish eyes. True story.